Friday, November 25, 2011

Friendship, Faith & Whatever else I feel like adding :)

Can I just say that a piece of toasted sourdough bread with butter is practically a slice of Heaven? (Pun intended..)
Also, I don't know about you- but I find that a cup of hot anything tastes even better when the cup has been sitting on a saucer.

It feels like a lot has been happening lately. Nothing that will probably make you sit on the edge of your seat in anticipation, but still. New happenings nonetheless.

Some of you probably saw my Facebook status earlier this last week about losing my "only Connecticut friend".  First, let me tell you that I *do* have other friends in this State- but none that I really hang out with. So I guess...technically they'd be more of acquaintances?
And second, I'm sorry I put that piece of sob sob info out for everyone to see.
Do you ever put something as your Facebook status and then later think, "Wow. That was ...ridiculous."  That's how I'm currently feeling. 
Someone asked me recently "Oh, did your friend move or something?" And then Kyle turns to me and says, "How'd they know about that?"
"Oh...I put it as my status".  Instant embarrassment.

Without airing all of my "dirty laundry "- let's just say that my friendship that ended was probably the shortest, oddest friendship I've ever been a part of. Ha.
Initially when it happened- I cried.
I had longed for a girl friend for SO long- that I felt jipped. Alone. . .again.
However, it didn't last long-thankfully. And that fact alone tells me that I'm growing up a little. The old me would have probably felt sorry for myself for weeks.

Kyle was wonderful, as usual. He brought me a box of luscious Godiva chocolates and a card from my favorite company, Papyrus.
The next day I received a package from my friend, Brittany. Filled to the top with candies for Kyle and I, Starbucks Iced Coffee, and a Thanksgiving card. I cried, again. (Wow...noticing a trend much?)

Immediately I felt peace. And gratefulness.
I realized (finally!) that it's not having friends nearby that matters. It's having good friends that matters- even if they're thousands of miles away.
I am truly blessed for the good, solid friendships that I have and HAVE had, this whole time. I didn't appreciate them fully, which I'm sad to admit.


Being a Christian these days is super duper hard. At least for me.
I find that I'm always questioning, "Wait. I know I asked forgiveness. And I truly meant it...but...did God forgive me? Really? Because I still feel that guilt in my gut, lurking."
Last night Kyle and I were talking. And he mentioned that at his men's group they were talking about being "luke-warm Christians".  He said that he wants us to go above and beyond and not just 'get by' with our Christian walk both individually and together.
I felt that stirring in my stomach and started venting to Kyle about what I've been dealing with. Temptations, feelings of not being good enough. And I started sobbing. (Ok, this is really getting ridiculous now...! )
Partially because I was hurting and partially because Kyle has become such a man of Christ.
He was quoting scripture and comforting me- and then the magical question- "Can I pray with you?"
Le sigh.
What a dream boat! :)
Mid prayer I felt my burdens being lifted.
I can't tell you how thankful I am to the Lord for a Husband who is a Spiritual leader. (...and handsome and hardworking and romantic and kind and hilarious...and...and..)



Update on our little Creeper:  He's good! 
I don't know what it was- but he's been eating regularly, playing around, sleeping a normal amount....he's himself again. I'm thankful for that. Although I'm not forgetting anything the Vet has told us. You just never know...

Random detail about myself:  I have a slight obsession with buttons. Like, the buttons on computers, cash registers...laptops...calculator...phones...
Yep. I do.
I'm not sure if it's the feeling, the sound it makes...or both. But I love pushing buttons.
When I was younger, my Mom would take me to second hand stores or garage sales- and whenever we found a good deal on something with 'buttons'- she'd get it for me. I could spend hours and hours playing "store" or "secretary" or "secret agent".
I'm sure that if any of my close friends are reading this, they can recall me roping them into a game involving "buttons". Ha. 
This also may be one small reason why I adore the movie You've Got Mail. Hello?! Have you not noticed the "tap, tap, tap" of the keyboards as they email each other??

I suppose I should end this. I'm going to try attempting a story, although I don't have any decent inspiration right now.

As always, thanks for faithfully reading.

Manda




2 comments:

Nicole Behrens said...

That hot cocoa/coffe/whatever it is in the adorable cup up there looks delicious..... So delicious I decided to go make my own cup of hot cocoa!

Abbi said...

hahaha... I totally remember the button thing! Pushing buttons on the cash registers at camp= fave! :)